Thoughts, Quips, and Aphorisms—Part 7

If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans. Not because he’s a psycho who knows you’ll fail, but because you’re so darn cute when you say it.

An essay is proud, and vain, but blessed are the aphorisms, for they shall inherit the earth.





Mute, n. One who says only what is necessary.





Unexpected the expected





The Holy Ghost, because not all heroes have shapes.





Those aren’t news stories, they’re software updates for your mind.

Picking a side is just choosing dark mode or light.





Aphorizz, n. The ability to charm women with concise and witty expressions of truth





I'm leaving now, but I should arrive yesterday. I'm taking a secret passage of time.





The moon landing was fake

Apologize apollo guys





Theophobia, n. The beginning of knowledge.





The great thing about peas is they don’t do podcasts.





I yearn to feel stupid since that is how I feel in God’s presence.





The Earth is bipolar, and she’s majestic and wise





A little humility goes a long way.

So don’t overdo it.